Day 8

I honestly don't know where to start off in this entry. Mixed emotions and lost thoughts are making this very complicated for me. Who knew what little change could make such a huge difference.

Count down to the biggest three days of my life. CTSO competition. I still need to start on our chapter report and letter to our advisor. I'm seriously afraid of making myself look like a totally doosh bag in front of my competitors. & Right after that is retreat. The messed up part is that the convention ends at 4 and I gotta be at the church on friday at 4. I don't know how I am going to pull it off, but if there's a will there's a way. And oh boy, am I willing to get there on time!

Another big load on my shoulder is my sister's birthday. Since I got hired at Champs, idk if I'll be able to be there to celebrate it. My family is counting on me, and I'm not even sure if I could pull that off. Besides that fact, I haven't been doing much for the dance team. I don't know if they are even ready for the performance this saturday. I won't even be able to watch their performance cause I'll be working.

God seems to always do this to me. He puts me on this wild rollercoaster ride. I've reached the highest hill and now he pushed me down. I'm just taking in all the wind blowing in my face cause obviously God believes I can handle it. & I believe so too. I'm just very nervous.

One last thing that's been bothering me. I'm still wondering about a situation. Go back to my blogs where I wrote about the thing I wanted, but never could have. The question "why?" still pops in my mind everytime. Now I try to avoid going to mrs q's class during lunch. I honestly rather not think of it at all. So here I am running away from my problems. It's done me good before, no harm in doing it again.

Day 8: God doesn't give you things you cannot handle.