Love?

Love. There is one you get from God. There are the kind that you get from your family. There are the kind that you get from your friends. Then there are the kind you get from a significant other and that's the one that I lack. I really don't need someone to "love" but days like these I wish I did. Couples EVERYWHERE! It makes me feel lonely.

Honestly, I am pretty satisfied being single. There's no drama, no problems, no fights, no arguments. I love the freedom, love the peace, love the randomness. Things that I limit when I have a boyfriend is what I have now.

It's just events like "DATE NIGHT." My friends are planning a date night for my best friend's birthday. Apparently, I have no date. And Winterball is coming up. Guess what? I have no date. Special occasions like these make me miss having a boyfriend.

I only experienced these kind of occasions with one boyfriend. All my other relationships never did last long enough for a special holiday to spend with. With that boyfriend, I spend New years, Valentines day, Easter, Lenten Season, Birthdays, Aniversaries, Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, any holiday that you can think of, we celebrated. Now that the holidays are coming around, this is the first time in 2 years that I'm gonna have to spend them alone.

It does make me sad. I mean, I know I have my friends, but they all got their boyfriends and being with them just isn't the same. I always feel left out. Now that these events are coming up, I complain cause I have no date. Everyone says I should bring my best friend, Sean, but he has his own life and love thing going on. So far, I'm going stag to winterball. As for the date night, I have a week or two to find one. Or I'll just stag with that also.

I really do miss that feeling of having someone text you in the morning just to tell you that he loves me. I miss being excited to see him everyday at lunch or afterschool. I miss being treated like a princess. I miss being called babe, and being told that he misses me. I miss being loved so unconditionally that it makes other people sick.

UGH, who needs boyfriends. I've lived without one, and I'm doing fine. Well at least I think I am.